Kamis, 11 Oktober 2012

Happily Ever After

Dear, Mr Lonely (or if I could say you are Mr. Happy right now , because you won’t be lonely anymore)

Congratulation for your wedding. I hope you will have a sakinah, mawaddah, warohmah family. And be happily ever after. And thank you for pray me success and barokah. *Okay enough for basa-basinya*.

Do you want to know the story behind it? Check it out.

First, I’ve heard about the news from your brother. He tells me that you’ll be married. But he doesn’t tell me who she is. I really curious about the person who could steal your freeze heart. The person who could conquer your stone. Maybe your brother still doesn’t know if she will accept your propose or not, so he won’t tell me. But after hearing that news, my heart is terribly shocked. Is it true that you’ll get married? Or is that just an issue? Whatever it is, I still can’t accept it anyway.

I remember how your momma prohibits you to be a marriage man. I remember how you always say that you’re lonely and nobody would understand you. I remember when we shared our top secret stories. And I still remember when we went out together. And I always remember any kind of your words.

Just like a broken glass, my heart breaks into pieces. I can’t fix it anymore. Just like a kid who loses his moms and doesn’t know which way to go. I’m confused. I lost my sights. Everything that I see is always the darkness. I still can’t believe this. And my heart always says “How come?” “How could this be happened?”.

And after I know the result and decision, I can’t stop blame myself. How stupid I am. How stupid I am. How stupid I am. I give my pure heart to person who isn’t appropriate enough to have it. Why I always do that. Why I always give my hope to someone’s wrong. Why I can’t learn from previous case. It happened twice loh. Yeah, that’s why I call it “stupidity”.

If you don’t need me, you can refuse me. If you don’t want me, you don’t have to ask me out. It’s just like you see me as a toy. Something which is not important. Like a garbage. An “unused” thing. Nothing to be considered. After use me, you can throw me away to somewhere far. No need to think my feeling. Yeah, just a garbage.

As A Human Being, I Cry unconsciously

But after I think and think again, after the holy month passed by, after a tons of “kegalauan”, I know that this is nobody’s fault. It happens because it has to be. And I have to through this to make me wiser and not too quick making a decision.

And never give more attention to person who looks mature, wise and something charming. But first, see his personality. But it’s not guarantee at all. The most important thing is knowing the person deeply. Find out his/her interest, perspective, maturity and what they think about “agama”. If he/she underestimate the rule of religion, so you will know their quality.

Now, I could accept the reality. The game is over. The winner rises. And that’s not me. And I know Alloh will give the best person to me. He isn’t appropriate enough to be with me. He was made to someone else. I was made to someone best.

Just like my friends always said: “Never use your heart deeply to someone who is not your husband. Before you are bounded in bound which called marriage. Because your truly love was made just for your the only one husband.”

I have moved on. Maybe this incident doesn’t so hurt me enough. But it still hurts. And I’ve ever through the worse moment. And I still alive anyway. What I have to do now is to improve my quality and be a good woman to get a good man. Because a good man is made for a good woman. That is appropriateness.

And also never too easy to open the heart. Because I deserve to be treated best. Don’t too fast to believe men’s words. People could be lying.

So keep smiling and face the world with my confident. Stay hilarious as usual. Like me. Who I used to be and Who I am. *cheers

P.S: For all the men in the world, please never give any hopes to women when you can’t give her a hope. If you don’t love her, leave her. Never see women’s feeling as nothing and give her attention because you give a pity for her. Women are human just like you. So treat them well.

May Alloh make your new family be a barokah and happily ever after. 

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